Just for Tonight
by Sir Caderousse
Summary: Sirius Black has been fond of Remus Lupin since last Christmas. The Marauders don't know about this... until the morning after they arrive for their fifth year at Hogwarts. SiriusRemus chap 3 up
1. Trainride

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Title: Just for Tonight

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Author: Mad Amecom PTE

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Email: mad_amecom_pte@hotmail.com

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Disclaimer: I don't own any of the characters, locations, or anything that has to do with Harry Potter. I wish I did though...

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Notes: This is a revision of a story I wrote last summer (titled "Just Friends"). I realized what I wrote was really crappy because I was just trying to write as much as I could in the shortest amount of time. Quantity so does not equal quality. Anyways, I hope you enjoy this story and I'd like to thank monster_within for (sort of unintentionally) reminding me of this story. Well, that's it. Read and review, please! There's more to come.

It was about five minutes until 11:00 at Platform 9 3/4. Five minutes until the Hogwarts Express made its way towards Hogwarts School of Witchcraft and Wizardry. The large crowd that stood on the platform hustled and bustled. There were parents of ten-year-olds waving frivolously to the children whom would be leaving home for the first time. There were scattered cliques of teenagers pulling up their robes to show each other the latest fashion of trousers among London muggles that seemed to flair out from the ankle. There were friends catching up with each other for the first time in all of the summer hugging and slapping each other's backs in good cheer. All of this activity seemed normal to the indifferent honey-eyed boy stepping into a cart on one of the scarlet engine's cars. After five years of going to Hogwarts, anyone would most likely become accustomed to the yearly ritual. He dropped his thin body onto a seat near the window, barely indenting the soft cushion. Just as he turned to examine the few students that rushed onto the train, which had started to chug along the track, a nest of messy black hair with some glasses barely visible underneath shot into the doorway.

  
"Remus Lupin! What are you doing sitting in this cart all by your lonesome self?" The boy under that mess of hair plopped himself onto the seat opposite Remus. "C'mon, mates! He's in here!" He shouted out the door. In rushed another black haired lad (though his hair was noticeably groomed better) and a rosy cheeked, chubby one. The chubby one sat down beside Remus. "Ah! It's great to have the Marauders together again! So, how did summer treat you?" The messy-haired boy asked.

  
"Not too bad," stated Remus, "And you, James?"

  
James put on a devilish grin and pushed his thick, black rimmed glasses up. "Bloody marvellous. Sirius and I snuck up to a girl's camp while we were camping. There was some wanking off that night!" He elbowed Sirius hard in the side. Sirius flashed his eyes up to Remus's grimacing face and back down to the floor.

  
"I certainly didn't enjoy it. Besides, the girls heard you panting before they even showed a bit of skin." Sirius quickly spat. "You really shouldn't have mentioned this around Peter. Look at his face change fifty shades of red!"

  
"It is not!" the round, blonde haired boy yelled, covering his blushing with Remus's Defence Against the Dark Arts textbook.

  
"You didn't enjoy-" Remus started but was cut off by Sirius hurling himself at Peter, trying to pry the book from away from his face. Peter squealed and fell to the floor and James announced another victory for the 'All-Powerful Sirius'. They all laughed as Remus sat and forgot his question, watching the scenery outside his window pass.

  
Once they arrived at Hogwarts everything preceded normally. The four crowded into a cart and chattered until they reached the huge ancient-looking castle that they would call their home and school for the next year. All of the students scurried to the great hall and placed themselves at their respective house tables. The Sorting was done fairly quickly and the Gryffindores table cheered as the Sorting Hat announced that Charles Zhambria would be placed in their house (mostly because he was the last first year and the feast would start now the Sorting was done). Magnificent amounts of food appeared along the tables and it all began disappearing into the student's mouths faster than it appeared. James continued to tell Peter and Remus about the girl's camp caper while Sirius rolled his eyes and started introducing himself to first year Gryffindores. Remus felt himself tuning out what James was excitedly jabbering about and didn't notice his eyes stray over to Sirius. That is, until he introduced himself to a shiny-haired first year, who was particularly mature and attractive looking for her age. Remus suddenly felt his face getting hot and his mouth frowning. He turned away from the flirting girl and grinning Sirius to listen (or at least, pretend to listen) about the caper. 

After the feast was over, the crowds of kids slowly started draining out of the Great Hall, following their house Prefects. The Marauders made their way up the steps to the room labelled "5th Years", which contained four beds and bed tables with their luggage sitting on each bed. All of them, started unpacking their things, except Sirius, whom was lying lazily on his mattress. He sighed, "Damn. Can you believe us four have been together for five years? It blows my mind how we survived all of those fights and detentions and accidents."

  
James nodded in agreement, "Yeah, but we're still best friends! That's all that matters right?" He looked around at the other three. Peter was the only one who seemed to respond, which he did with a hearty 'thumbs-up'. Remus, who seemed to be drifting along in his own little world, continued unpacking. Sirius looked over to the wiry boy putting various coloured jumpers in a drawer and let out a long sigh into his pillow.

  
"Right. Friends."


	2. Bedcurtains

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Title: Just for Tonight

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Author: Mad Amecom PTE

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Email: mad_amecom_pte@hotmail.com

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Disclaimer: I don't own any of the characters, locations, or anything that has to do with Harry Potter. I wish I did though...

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Notes: Second chapter! I left a bunch of the original stuff in here. Thanks to RikuNghts, Hannio, SiriuslyRemus, Gypsy Lupin-Black, and Gold Silk for reviewing! And to 'the counter', I know who you are!! Hah. Actually, yeah, I understand that my fic may not seem original to you, but R/S is my one true (and now only) pairing and I always wanted to right a fic about them. So I did. And it sucked. So now I'm fixing it up. Sorry if you don't like it, Zoe. Anyway, please keep reviewing and I'll keep on writing- er, revising. ^^;;

"What was that, Sirius?" Remus asked inattentively. Sirius shook his head and looked out the window into the misty sky lighted by the moon. His shoulder length black hair looked a sharp navy blue in the shimmering moonlight and his dark eyes seemed full of depth and softness. He let out yet another deep sigh and glanced at Remus. His mouth was slightly parted and his cheeks were tainted a slight pink colour.

  
"Moony? Why you starin' at me like that?" Sirius questioned him. He quickly snapped out of the trance to answer the question.

  
"I was staring? I'm sorry, I was, um, I was..." He started blushing more furiously as he stammered and stumbled for an excuse.

  
'That look... I'd know that look anywhere. It's the way those little girls stare at me. Does Remus... fancy me?' Sirius's eyes widened as he pondered and he turned away from the blushing lad. His eyes widened momentarily in realization, but he quickly blinked the thought out. 'Ugh. What's wrong with me? Rem isn't _gay_.' Coming back to reality, he saw Remus had shut the drapings around his bed and yelled a quick "'Night." before Sirius could question him further. Sirius cocked his towards James, "Did you see that?"

  
"See what?" James yawned, whilst placing his thick-rimmed glasses on the nightstand.

  
"The way Rem looked at me, James! You didn't see it?! It was like he was..." he lowered his voice, "Fascinated with me o-or something! You know, it's that look the girls give me!"

"REALLY?" James asked excitedly.

  
"Shut up!" Peter yelled from his bed, "Some of us are trying to get some sleep!" Sirius ran over the Peter's bedside.

  
"Did you see it, Pete? The way Rem looked at me? Did you?" Sirius whispered (a bit louder than intended) as he grabbed the collar around Peter's bloated neck.

  
"What are you talking about, you lunatic? Do you think Remus likes you or something?" he interrogated pulling away from Sirius.

  
"Well... I was just-"

  
"'Cause that's just plain nasty! Ugh... guys liking other guys... what a cartload of sickos they are." Peter scoffed. "Remus isn't like that. Now I'm going to sleep whether you wanna keep talking about homos or not." He pulled the draping around his bed shut and made a 'humph' sound.

  
"Jeez, good night to you, too. Talk about homophobia..." James said, obviously annoyed at Peter's outburst. "Anyways, did he really look at you like that, Padfoot?" Sirius crawled away from Peter's bedside and back next to James and paused before nodding. "Maybe you should ask him about it." Sirius frowned at his notion, but James just hopped onto his bed and laid his head down on his pillow. "Whatever you wanna do, mate. I'm going to sleep. Goodnight."

  
"Yea... 'Night, Prongs."

  
Sirius didn't- no, couldn't sleep. He sat on his bed, curtains closed, pondering. No one knew his secret that he'd been keeping for almost a year. He had a crush on Remus. He had only realized it last year during Christmas vacation, when they all found out Rem's mother had to be hospitalised after she slit her wrists when she found out her husband was seeing another woman. Sirius had found him sitting in the common room, staring blankly into the fireplace while the Christmas feast was going on. "Remus? Are you... going to be alright?" Sirius had asked him as his put a hand on his face that had been totally drained of any colour. Remus merely turned and tilted his head towards Sirius and he grinned. Tears started to stream down his face, but he didn't remove of his smile even when he started choking the pain. Sirius pulled the sobbing boy close and slipped his arms around his shoulders to comfort him. Neither of them said anything. Both sat in front of the dimming fire taking in each other's presence. Nothing was ever mentioned of that day, not even between the two.

  
"Friend." Sirius spat into his pillow. He had never loathed such a word in his life. Sirius was truly happy with having Remus as his best friend, but it made him depressed when he was titled Remus's 'friend'. His 'chum'. His 'pal'. It was a constant reminder that that's all they would ever be. Friends. And nothing more. Sirius couldn't handle knowing that. He longed to touch those pale, soft lips and embrace them with his own. He longed to caress the small boy's bare back while they lie together in each other's arms. He longed to taste every inch of his salty, smooth skin. Most of all, Sirius wanted Remus's love and devotion in return. He knew he'd never be truly happy without a mutual relationship. 

Sirius groaned into his pillow as his heart sank at these thoughts. He pulled his bed curtains open slowly and spied around the room. Peter was snoring, James was muttering something in his sleep about the girl's lavatory, and there was Remus's bed.

Sirius could hear him drawing in slow, deep breaths. He tiptoed over to the closed drapings and slowly parted them. He almost gasped out loud at the elegant beauty sleeping in front him. The sheet-covered chest slowly rose up and down in a definite rhythm, reassuring Sirius he was in a deep state of sleep. He looked Remus's porcelain face. His cheeks were the same colour they were when Sirius caught him staring, and his lips were the same shade. Sirius stared at the barely moving lips and got an idea. '...He'll never know,' he thought to himself, 'I'll be the only one...' He sat on the bed and lowered his head to the pale, soft lips that he had always dreamt about. Sirius stared into Remus's face, only mere centimetres. And then Remus's eyes parted, ever so slightly. Sirius froze. His eyes widened and his pupils contracted. 'SHIIIT!!!' he screamed mentally. Remus merely yawned.

  
"Sirius... hah hah." The half-asleep boy slid his arms around the panicking Sirius and pulled him into his chest. "Back to sleep..." Remus yawned and fell back into a deep slumber. And there was Sirius stuck Remus's arms. He panicked. How would James and Peter take it when they found- wait, how would REMUS take it when he found Sirius asleep in his arms?! He calmed a bit and slowly began to realized exactly where he was. He was exactly where he's wanted to be since last Christmas. He thought about it for a moment and pulled one arm from Remus's embrace and closed the curtains.

  
"Just for tonight."


	3. Confessions

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Title: Just for Tonight

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Author: Mad Amecom PTE

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Email: mad_amecom_pte@hotmail.com

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Disclaimer: I don't own any of the characters, locations, or anything that has to do with Harry Potter. I wish I did though...

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Notes: Huzzah! Third chapter = COMPLETED! I hope yins are satisfied with this, I put off my science fair report to do this! Hah hah. Thanks to SailorBaby16, reddiej, RougeSpike, and penny_lady for R/R (to Kyris, my review page is not the place to pimp your fics, but it was pretty good)! Thanks to Hannio, Gold Silk, Gypsy Lupin-Black, and RikuNghts. Also to Gypsy, I understand what you mean about not liking Peter's reaction, but that's all part of his character. In my fics, he starts getting "evil" in 5th year. The marauders were so busy with their own lives, the only time they got to hang with Peter was during pranks and lunch, and the only time he was noticeably getting darker was when something came up about something he didn't like. Apparently (from chap 1), homosexuals are one thing he isn't fond of. As for the Xmas contest, I've been blasted with schoolwork, but I'll try to do the contest. If I don't finish it, I'll make it up to you in one way or another that'll be just as good ;D. 

It was a radiant, new morning. Sunlight poured into the Marauder's dorm through the hazy glass window. James stumbled out of bed with a yawn and rubbed his eyes. He grabbed his glasses off of the nightstand and placed them on his face, making his eyes seem a bit smaller. He looked around the room to see if he was the only one up. Peter's bed curtains were still drawn closed, as were Sirius's and Remus's. He walked over to the bed nearest and pulled the drapings over, revealing an empty bed. "Sirius is gone? Maybe he went to breakfast already." James looked at a watch laying on Sirius's nightstand, "6:30? There's no way he could be up." He walked over to Remus's bed and said softly, "Hey Rem, you awake? Sirius ain't in his bed. Are you a- WHOA." In bed was not only Remus, but also Remus and Sirius entwined in each other's arms. James quickly shoved the curtains back together and crawled back into his bed. "M-must be seeing thing... need more sleep." He threw his glasses on the nightstand and pulled his blanket over his head.

  
  
About a quarter of an hour later Remus stirred a bit. He opened his eyes and blinked a bit before realizing what he was holding onto. The boy's face turned deep scarlet and he mentally shrieked. 'WHAT IS SIRIUS DOING IN MY BED- IN MY ARMS?!' He tried to recollect the night before... Sirius got him gawking at him, so he rushed off to bed. 'Augh! Then how is he-" Then he remembered. Remus had dreamt that he tripped down a set of stairs, an event that actually happened when he was six. But in his dream, he kept falling and falling into a shallow darkness that just didn't stop. All of the sudden, everything turned light and a boy behind a curtain of black hair caught him. The boy leaned in, as if to kiss him, and for some reason... Remus suddenly recognised him as Sirius. 'But that was just a dream! It isn't possible.' He pondered for a mere second that Sirius climbed into his bed with him, but that was quickly pushed from his mind. 'What am I going to do~? I got to get out of here...' With that, Remus silently slipped out of Sirius's arms. He dressed quickly and then scurried off to early breakfast with a hint of a blush still donned upon his face.

  
  
Sirius continued to sleep in Remus's bed until he felt a hard smack on his head (which woke him abruptly, of course). "What the hell!?" he yelled through clenched teeth looking up at the mess of hair that did it, "What's your fucking problem, James!?"

  
"YOU'RE the one with the problem, Mr. Black." James said with a frown. Sirius quickly realized where he was and turned as red as Remus an hour earlier.

  
"Shit. Shit. Shit." He said, covering his head with a sheet.

  
"What the hell were you doing in Rem's bed? I thought I was having a dream (or a nightmare) when I woke up early this morning and saw you two..." he trailed off in awkwardness, "J-just explain yourself!"

  
"Is Peter or Remus around?" Sirius sighed.

  
"They're down at breakfast. Now SPILL!"

  
Sirius unwillingly told James of how he was over at Remus's bed when he woke up and grabbed him and how he couldn't get up without waking him. When he finished he pulled a pillow over his face and groaned. 

"Right, but why were you over at his bed?" James questioned him again, obviously confused. 

Sirius paused. This was it. He'd finally have to fess up after hiding it so carefully the past year. "James... I think I, I mean, I know I'm..." he stumbled to find the right words but sighed as he found them, "I'm in love with Remus." There was a brief silence but James soon spoke up.

  
"Well, I kinda figured you liked him after seeing you two this morning, but love? Shit." Another pause. "Were you at his bed just staring at him or... something else." He blushed a little and looked at the floor. But Sirius laughed.

  
"I was going to kiss him. I thought 'No one'll know!' but then he opened his eyes and smiled... and pulled me close. I was panicking but then I calmed down and just stayed with him, you know?" James smiled a bit and nodded.

  
"When are you gonna tell him?"

  
"When? Don't you mean 'Are'?"

  
"C'mon, mate. Don't you think he's figured it out by now, finding you with him this morning n' all? You owe it to Remus. You owe it to yourself."

  
"I can't! Not now!" James looked at him with his piercing blue eyes and Sirius turned away, "But I will soon. Right now, we'll just act as if nothing happened." 

James frowned."Don't you think he'll say something?"

  
"I'll bet he's too mortified. I can't tell him until Christmas anyways."

  
"Why?"

  
"Because it'll be exactly one year since I found out I loved him."

  
James grinned, "Wow, I never thought you were the romantic type, Padfoot."

  
"Shut yer' trap. Now let's stop talking about all this rubbish and go down to breakfast, I'm starving." Sirius threw on his robes and strode out of their dorm.

  
"You'll be starving for a piece of that werewolf before Christmas." James chuckled to himself. "I wonder if Remus feels the same way..."

  
"Feels the same way about what?" said a voice from the doorway.


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